You're not Overly Emotional, You're Emotionally Dysregulated 🌟

Key wellness strategies / self-care techniques / productivity-style tips

Reframe what’s happening (no self-blame)

• The speaker describes emotional disregulation as a real, explainable phenomenon—not “you’re overly emotional” or a character flaw.
• Emotional reactions can be disproportionate to the situation and can feel “out of control.”
• The emphasis: this is not your fault and is treatable with practice.

Understand the concept (what emotional disregulation is)

• Definition shared: decreased ability to control emotional responses, leading to reactions that may seem like “overreactions.”
• Connection discussed (not presented as an official ADHD symptom):
  • Neurodivergent brains may have weaker emotion-regulation signaling between the amygdala and cerebral cortex.
  • As a result, emotions can flare before rational thinking catches up.

Use “space” as an in-the-moment regulation tool

• Main coping method: create time/space so your brain can shift from emotional response to rational response.
• Practical examples:
  • Say “I need a break” during tough conversations.
  • Leave the room / pause / hang up and step away.
  • Allow a short period (speaker mentions ~10 minutes) to feel the emotion without acting on it.
• After the pause:
  • Check in with yourself about the desired outcome.
  • Respond more intentionally.

Identify early cues (before the blow-up)

• Strategy: notice what your body signals when you’re approaching disregulation.
• Examples of cues:
  • Tears and an urge to cry
  • Shakiness / a sweaty feeling
  • For anger: heat, tension, sweaty palms, and feeling compelled to “blurt everything”
• Suggested exercise:
  • Later that day/evening, reflect on what came before the episode to learn your personal warning signs.

Regulate differently depending on the emotion

• The approach: you can’t just shove feelings down—you may need to feel them in a supported way.

When sadness is the leading emotion

• Take space from people
• Cry intentionally (bath, alone time, a “good cry”)
• Comfort/self-soothing options:
  • Pillow/blanket feeling (“hug without judgment”)
  • Cold water to jolt the system
  • Shower
  • Sensory support: turn off lights and rest in bed

When anger is the leading emotion

• Reframe anger as valid (not inherently “ugly”).
• Safe expression options mentioned:
  • Punch pillows / use a squish object (no people)
  • Scream into the squish
  • Workout / run / intense exercise / workout class as an outlet
• If anger is “steewing,” plan an outlet soon (example: book a workout class for later).

What to practice over time (long-term improvement)

The speaker emphasizes three core takeaways:

1. Emotional disregulation may not mean you’re “the problem”—and it’s practice-able.
2. Recognize cues early (body signals for sadness/anger/out-of-control).
3. Once you notice it, express and regulate in a way that helps your brain process and move forward.

Presenter / sources

• Haley (speaker/creator)
• ADHD Center in the UK (quoted definition of emotional disregulation)
• Joel PhD (cited for explanation involving the amygdala and cerebral cortex)