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Celebrity Reenactment #3: Silence of the Lambs

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A comic take on The Silence of the Lambs turns the lotion-in-the-basket scene into an awkward hostage negotiation. The captive politely points out that he’s been abducted and dropped into a dark hole, then offers his entire fortune—$111 and a Macaroni Grill gift certificate—to calm his captor.

The captor keeps barking orders and threatening violence, while the captive complains about the rude treatment, wonders if he even needs the lotion, and observes that the captor seems like “a very hostile” psychopath. He also gets distracted by cookies, prompting another furious command to put one down.

The captive finally launches into a relatable-sounding rant about how annoying it is to be imprisoned by a creepy redneck who wants to wear your skin—before asking for a very large mallet.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger and Woody Allen.

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