The disappearance of men | Christine Emba

Overview

Christine Emba argues that public discussion of masculinity has become dominated by negative framing—such as claims that “men are trash/garbage” and the label “toxic masculinity.” She contends this makes it difficult to persuade audiences that men’s struggles are real and deserve attention.

She also notes a mismatch between visibility and lived reality: while men are still highly represented in top roles (e.g., presidents and major corporate leadership), this does not reflect how many men—especially younger men—are actually faring.

Where Men Are “Struggling” (Three Areas)

Emba identifies three major areas where men are “struggling,” possibly approaching crisis:

1. The Labor Market

• Globalization and de-industrialization have reduced jobs that were traditionally male-coded and physically oriented.
• The economy increasingly rewards credentials.
• Many men—especially ages 25–34—have experienced substantial declines in labor-market participation despite being prime working age.

2. Education

• Title IX expanded women’s access to education.
• A later shift has emerged: men increasingly fall behind.
• The pandemic caused a major drop in college enrollment.
• Emba reports that about 70% of the dropout decline involved men.

3. The Domestic Sphere / Relationships

• Stagnant wages and reduced participation in work and education create downstream effects on social life and relationship stability.
• She notes that young women are more likely to report being single, but young men more often report trouble finding a partner as well.
• She points to changing norms in couple economics: nearly half of women report earning as much as or more than their partners, which can feel destabilizing to men trying to understand their “place” in the arrangement.

NEETs, Online Withdrawal, and Influencers

Emba addresses a perceived “disappearance” of some men from society, describing NEETs (not in education, employment, or training).

She suggests many withdraw into:

• Online spaces (including incel forums and “men going their own way” groups)
• Video games, where achievement and recognition may feel more attainable than in the real-world job market

She also argues that “manfluencers”—naming Jordan Peterson, Andrew Tate, and Joe Rogan—can channel men’s distress into a narrative that the world wronged them.

Potential Upsides (According to Emba)

Emba acknowledges benefits these influencers can provide, especially:

• Empathy
• Practical self-improvement “scripts,” such as:
  • “Clean up your room”
  • Basic discipline
  • Fitness/diet routines
  • A sense of aspirational masculinity

Major Downside

Her main critique is that many define masculinity in opposition to women. She condemns misogynistic rhetoric and cites extreme examples, including Andrew Tate, who she says promotes violence toward women and has been arrested in Romania for sex trafficking.

Emba’s Core Prescription: Positive, Pro-Social Masculinity

Emba’s central prescription is that helping men in crisis requires a positive vision of masculinity—aspirational rather than denigrating, and not framed as “be more like women.”

She proposes that “positive masculinity” should be:

• Specific
• Grounded in values men themselves identify as important

These include:

• Strength (not only physical)
• Self-mastery
• Leadership
• Responsibility
• Care for others

She frames these values as partly connected to biology (e.g., testosterone-linked traits like assertiveness and sex drive), but emphasizes they must be channeled pro-socially—for the good of others and society.

Not a Zero-Sum Argument

Emba addresses the concern that emphasizing “male” traits implies women must lack them. Her response is that it is not a zero-sum game: both sexes rise and fall together, and a healthier society requires both men and women to flourish.

Presenters or Contributors

• Christine Emba — author and journalist (speaker/host)
• Mentioned influencers/commentators: Jordan Peterson, Andrew Tate, Joe Rogan
• Referenced policy/institution: Title IX (U.S. federal law)