Summary of "Subs wanting to be owned by a Femdom"

Overview

The speaker (a femdom/mistress who refers to herself as the Red Queen / Mistress Nera) speaks candidly and informally about BDSM dynamics (especially “being owned”), relationships with subs, pet care, beauty/makeup, safety, authenticity online, and gear quality. Much of the talk is anecdotal and blunt.

BDSM / Sub Ownership — Expectations and Advice

Being “owned” is a relationship and a responsibility, not a transactional one. Large tributes do not automatically prove loyalty, obedience, or long-term consistency.
Ownership and submission should be negotiated and tailored to the individuals involved — there is no one-size-fits-all agreement.
Ways a sub can demonstrate commitment:
- Show consistency over time rather than one-off tributes.
- Complete assigned real-world tasks (e.g., chores) and document them (photos/videos) when requested.
- Be honest about desires, limits, and capabilities; do not misrepresent yourself.
- Follow screening/application steps for in-person sessions (safety procedures like cash-meet protocols, information sharing).
Warning: many people expect quick results or treat ownership like a quick kink fix. True ownership requires investment and time.
The speaker refuses requests to badmouth someone’s partner as part of play.

Safety & Screening

Exercise caution with cash meets and in-person sessions.
Expect responsible doms/owners to request information and follow screening steps to ensure safety for everyone involved.
If you are new to BDSM, start slowly. Reputable dominants typically will not “own” someone for minimal tributes.

Pets & Pet-Related Tributes

The speaker has multiple dogs and expects subs to help fund pet care (food, toys, beds, vet visits, medication).
Typical estimates mentioned:
- Vet bills: roughly $250 (conservative example).
- Ongoing monthly pet support is expected from a pet-funded sub.
Tips:
- Address health issues early (example: a three-legged dog showing signs of arthritis).
- The speaker would prefer a dedicated “pet sub” to cover ongoing pet expenses.

Beauty / Makeup / Beauty-Subs

The speaker sometimes streams beauty purchases and accepts a “beauty regime sub” to pay for beauty boxes, makeup, and related items.
Conservative monthly tribute estimate: $150–$200.
Product mentions:
- Becca foundation (new)
- Kat Von D foundation (previously used)
- Boxycharm (beauty box picks)
Practical beauty tips:
- Wear sunscreen, especially avoid tanning your face to reduce premature wrinkles.
- Be cautious with filters and Facetune; edited images can create unattainable standards and encourage unnecessary cosmetic procedures.
- Know your real look and avoid over-tweaking your photos.
Seasonal makeup note: she mixes foundations seasonally to avoid an orange look.

Gear Quality (BDSM Toys and Whips)

Invest in quality gear rather than cheap knockoffs (better floggers, riding crops, whips matter for real play and impact).
Recommended sources: Etsy and specialty BDSM suppliers for durable, artisan gear.
The speaker has received play gear from subs (flogger, riding crop) and would like future subs to help buy equipment (e.g., bullwhip, high-end riding crop — mentions Hermes as a luxury example).
Practical note: purchases from her wishlist may be rewarded with content/photography in appreciation.

Authenticity Online & Filters

Many influencers use Facetune/Snow filters; this skews beauty expectations and self-perception.
Some people avoid filters to stay authentic; advice is to be mindful about image editing and how it affects self-esteem.
Recommendation: do not set impossible beauty standards for yourself based on heavily edited images.

Relationships & Personal Boundaries

If you’re in a toxic relationship, the speaker advises getting out — she acknowledges this is difficult and shares personal experience leaving a difficult partner.
Subs should treat dominants (women they serve) with respect; being a sub includes appreciating those you serve.
The speaker rejects attempts to emulate “female supremacy” by trashing other women or engaging in home-wrecking/shaming behavior.

Other Practical Ideas

Some subs manage practical tributes like opening/storing cards (e.g., a gas card) or paying bills/credit cards for the dom when boundaries and limits are agreed upon.
Wish-list model: using Amazon/Etsy wishlists or gift cards as tribute is common and appreciated, but not a substitute for genuine commitment.

Notable Locations, Products, and Mentions

Locations: Atlanta (traffic anecdote), California (gas price mention).
Products/services: Boxycharm, Becca foundation, Kat Von D foundation, Etsy (artisan whip makers), Amazon (wishlists), Hermes riding crop (desired luxury item), HomeGoods / T.J. Maxx.
Channels/people: YouTube channel “Information Overload” (video about influencers/Facetune).
Speaker identity: the Red Queen / Mistress Nera.